how to ask out a female cashier

Does the order of validations and MAC with clear text matter? At the end of the day, Im with Captain Awkward. I mean there are always like 5 people before and after me, and I think it would be awkward if we are changing numbers while customers are waiting behind us. Because of that, it can be easy to mistakenly misinterpret them doing their job (being nice to you) as social/romantic interest. One day, I put the money in her hand, and tickled her palm. No outside videos or links - mods dont have to verify if it follows the rules. I know I have a weirdly strong opinion on this, but no. The world has always been creepy, you just werent aware of it. Even if you think this guy might really like you, youre going to have to take it slow. She did fret for quite a bit over whether she was misreading general customer-facing friendliness for flirting, or whether he really was interested in her, but only platonically. An example could be, Hey so this is going to be super weird. Once you feel (please, do try to assess objectively) she's feeling somewhat comfortable, go in for a more direct hit. The amount was wrong. Scoring a volley in FIFA 22 is an art form that requires skill and finesse. They get stared at & aggressively flirted with on a regular basis. Then later on phone jobs I got asked out every once in a while and used the same excuse. I hated that aspect. As someone who has worked in customer service for a long time, I can tell you that it will make many customer service reps very uncomfortable. This doesn't require breaking any of these rules, but it requires finesse. Dont forget to sit with a coin between your knees! WebAnswer (1 of 16): No. Make sure everything is paid for, and walk away immediately after giving her that card. Its like when people say that women who are catcalled should feel flattered and that theyd personally feel soooo flattered if they had strangers harassing them on the street. My husband has recently asked me about a mfm *****. Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience. Ive always thought of it more as, Hey, youre someone that seems to be intereseting, and Id like to get to know you better. (Actually, kind of like a job interview in a lot of ways, haha. I hope you have the common sense to not stalk her, to find out where she lives or what she does in her free time just to find a loophole and ask her there. Seriously, how do you ask out a cute cashier (F) without being "that You rarely get a sense of whether someones interesting when theyre being polite or friendly due to the nature of their job. So, I'd strongly advise against even doing it this way. She thought they got along OK and that he seemed interested, but he never asked her out. Test more. I think Aaron indicated clearly that being flattered is tied specifically to an appropriate non-creepy invitation; he didnt suggest that any type of behavior is flattering as long as theres romantic interest. So sorry to say, for me at least, the perceived romantic connections were not real. Both scenarios happened to me multiple times and it was always uncomfortable and always put me in an intensely awkward situation. Having been on the receiving end, I can tell you I've always found it awkward and uncomfortable when someone has asked me out as opposed to leaving a note for me to choose to respond or not respond privately. Browse other questions tagged, Start here for a quick overview of the site, Detailed answers to any questions you might have, Discuss the workings and policies of this site. How are engines numbered on Starship and Super Heavy? Mutual friend. Ill text you! and then not do it. WebOriginally Answered: How do you ask a (girl) cashier out? Are there any canonical examples of the Prime Directive being broken that aren't shown on screen? He maintained professionalism through the drill, however, and never so much as asked her name during the drill. And then you never, ever speak of it again. If I didnt know them outside of the customer-employee interaction, theres no way in hell Id go to a private address. I thought that died out years ago. It stops being flattering at a certain point, and even then there is ALWAYS the pressure of Im at work how can I respond in a way that will keep this persons business and not cause a scene and get me in trouble with my boss?. They are paid to be nice and helpful and to show up where youre shopping if they think you might need help. I'm from the midwest and women in service definitely say those words, but it is more commonly heard from older women to younger men I'm gonna go touch some grass, you should too S SargeMaximus -- until you get the message, and she's not gonna like it (see Tinkeringbell's answer for examples). In fact, the last time I was nice to the tax office woman, I asked her if I was the first dude not to yell at her today. If I were single and shopping and met an individual Id like to ask out I would have. That's a pretty good indication something's happening. You never know! How To Ask A Cashier Out? - Criminal Defense Lawyer Hollywood She again said no. The flaw in this approach is there isn't really an explainable reason for telling her that. The problem is that all the good intent in the world doesnt really change how the service person being put on the spot is going to react. Like I said, Id be flattered, even if I was interested and it wouldnt be weird for me to see you again in the future. Don't think a girl is attracted to you because she's doing her job. Being friendly is literally part of their job description. He was never angry or aggressive when we were together, just smothering and overstepping his boundaries. Ask Amy: Is it still acceptable to refer to men as gentlemen and Asking a cashier out is not always an easy prospect. Also, the OP doesnt need to overthink: the answer is almost certainly no. Hes probably being nice to the OP because being nice to customers is part of his job. Thats exactly how Id do it. This will make things even more uncomfortable/annoying for the employee and might even cause her to face a reprimand at work if her employer doesn't fully understand what happened. *Actually, I was a lifeguard in another life. All rights reserved. In my case, it was simple. She declined, and he drove by her as she was walking to the bus stop and rolled down his window and asked her again if she wanted a ride. Well, the tricky thing about asking out someone in a customer service position is that their job requires them to be nice to you. Just as fraking capable of taking care of myself as any man ,thankyouverymuch. Im a male, nearly 30, and I have been going back and forth for weeks about somehow asking out this cashier at a grocery store I frequent. But I was going to come and suggest something like, Are you going to the ZYX event? Retail employees have to be nice to customers. Point is, right now they don't, and men "doing our usual" isn't going to move the needle. Is he single? The waitress said he was single and that hed love to get a number so we left her number with her credit car receipt. Please dont hit on the poor schmuck who has to be nice to you or get fired. There is also the fact that their job hinges on them being nice to everyone- also a power issue. What cinched it for me was my dad who was there with me. Its pretty much a lose/lose situation all around. Be prepared, your number might end up in the bin with a dramatic gesture, putting you on the spot right then and there, you might be labeled a creep and denied access to the store, depending on how much this tends to upset her. Resin is a vital resource for Conan Exiles players wanting to expand their base and create unlocks. Im married, so I definitely wasnt going to ask out the cute liquor store employee who likes the same kind of beer I like anyway. Holy cats, it was painful to watch him. For example maybe she likes art and you can suggest to her going to an art gallery together. I think youll only figure that out if you can talk to him outside of work. If you dont call well forget this ever happened.. ..what country do you live in? This will show the cashier that you are serious about your intentions of asking them out. Dont drop compliments and hit on her, asking how her day is First, make sure that you are respectful and courteous when asking for just joking. Re 2, though, if you dont know them, surely it is ONLY sexual? This is extra worse when youre a captive audience who cant get away from them at work, and its why a lot of us would recommend not asking at all or proceeding with extreme caution. 1. Flirt more. If you're awkward around women, and the cashier is the only girl talking to you in your whooooole entire life, then try shopping in another supermarket. No real point to this expect to share that I have now been enlightened :). If you get declined, however rudely, don't go complaining. How to ask someone you see regularly out on a date, without making it awkward? The way she did it was to grab another waitress and say hey, Id like to give my number to our waiter. But I didnt love YOU. They do it every Tuesday and Thursday at 7pm - the admission fee is 5 Euro. And Id probably be sure to check in on Swarm so thered be a record of it. You need to determine if hes being friendly because its his job, because hes naturally flirty, or because hes actually interested in you. If theyre creepy, weird, or not someone Id be interested in getting to know better, theres an easy out. She might even get her manager to deny you access to the store. So I guess its possible for these things to work out. should I even consider interviewing somewhere else if Im happy with my job. I think if the OP really, really wants to follow up on this guy, the way to do it is by very gradually escalating and paying a lot of attention to his responses. I always hope she'll be stocking shelves or something (so she would be a little more approachable) when I see her but she's either cashier or in back. Be casual, play it cool and do not put pressure on it, and Im saying this because I think youll go through with it. Theres a lot of baggage (no pun intended) with singling out Women For Special Protection. Or if she can recommend some better-tasting cookies. As several others already have replied - it depends where you are and the (as yet) unknown chemistry between you and the cashier. But see how youve mentally filed this under social interactions? If i ever did (which i wont because im too shy, but shes the most beautiful thing ive ever seen) ask her out and she said no, i wouldnt have a problem at all i think women are allowed to decide things by themselves and shouldnt be pressured into saying yes or no. Casually go her way, drop something or try to create a natural interaction, then start conversation. Manage Settings Because of that, it can be easy to So if you arrive and dump your emotional train wreck on her, like drop to your knees, pull out the guitar and go full-on Romeo on her, she'll have to stay put and silently cringe -- "G'aaah not again!" Well whats some do's and dont's. How To Ask Some talking must have occured behind the scenes Much later, she told me she was married. A: Rejection can be tough, but its important to accept it gracefully. Sorry to hear that it didnt work out (a haunted house would have been a very cool first date!) I am a fairly attractive, personable guy and have been asked out by several customers over the years, and its never been a problem. Also OP, I wonder if you have looked for him on online dating sites? The world is as creepy as its always been, but women have been learning to push back against some of the crap that society heaps on them as a punishment for merely existing and being female. There's a reason advances are looked down upon in these situations: it's not about the no/yes, it's about the fact that the likelihood of an honest answer being expected or given in such a situation is low, close to impossible. More specifically, he did not go tracking down any of her information. However, there was one guy that asked me out that I totally would have gone out with, if I hadnt already been dating my now-husband. Not most. I definitely advocate making any sort of social overture carefully and without undue pressure, I just dont know that I can agree with the voices advocating for blanket ban. I worked at a coffee shop for a few years so awkward when people would hit on me. Should be a great (event, e.g. Make yourself stupid by doing I am quite new to relationships, but the signs she gave me are promising. And heres my story to support that: back in my retail days, I worked in a shop that primarily catered to women, and men coming in tended to get a bit of special attention since they were something of a rarity (and often needed a little extra help from the employees). Even if she's busy on Thursday, or does not share your interest in this type of event it's a first step. When I worked retail, a man who grabbed me from behind when I was alone in the store and I told him to get his hands off me. Asking someone out should never sound like a mere business transaction; this could put off anyone from accepting your invitation! Flirting is fun! If you're feeling insecure because of the people around think about how it can make her feel too, either she agrees or not it will also put some pressure on her so try to do it when there's no one around, and be prepared to leave either she agrees or not. Privacy Policy and Affiliate Disclosures, I own a game store with a terrible manager who I'm afraid to fire. You can engage in small talk then, without a long queue forming behind you. It seems pointless to overthink when the answer is either yes or no. She could say yes, no, or not respond to the question. Why is this even an issue. That context is something that men need to be aware of when deciding its ok to flirt with a woman in a particular situation-which I think is what you were getting at. Your lindy hop can lead to a special moment for both of you, making the experience more memorable. After the date has ended, be sure to follow up with your date by sending them a text or calling them; this will show that you are interested and care about them. I had one regular while I was a barista ask me out in what seemed to be a sincere way, but when I turned him down then showed up every single goddamn day and stared at me for almost a month. Seriously. Keep a close eye on who listens intently to what youre saying, and who just wants to hear themselves talk. Disclaimer: I have never worked in retail, so Ive never had this experience. I flirted and flirted with himI mean REALLY laid it on thick and I couldnt figure out why he wasnt responding. Back to the prerequisites of whimsy. Awkwardness is the enemy of whimsy. - This is a **positive community**. @Kidburla From France. I let them all down gently, the ones who were grossed I told my manager about, and the ones who were polite [key point] were cool with me afterward and there was no awkwardness between us [key point]. We flirted for (probably 5) months and I finally asked him out one day. If she is interested in you and has time, she will probably arrange to come to the event some time and you will see her there. You can still have conversation with them, but don't put her on the spot. Frankly, lots of social interactions make me feel a little weird or uncomfortable, but theyre totally normal and acceptable interactions nonetheless, and I dont think my discomfort always reflects negatively on the people doing the initiating. A man then became irate, police said and waited for the cashier to walk away. Much better, now we've avoided putting her on the spot, we've just slipped her a little bit of intelligence, with no request whatsoever for her to act. Im going to respectfully disagree. To clarify, I was talking about adult students, but still. With same-sex flirting, I feel like its a zillion times harder. I think the only thing saving me from flirting being a daily occurrence where I was assigned was that our typical customers were older, often married, women. Show confidence. Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers. Tip number 2 for getting cashier girls: To seduce a cashier girl, be very well dressed and be well groomed. And there's the factor that when men are hurt, they sometimes hurt back. Whatever you do don't follow them after work into the parking lot. There there from Radiohead rings a bell. When people tell you over and over again that this behavior is not flattering or OK, replying with Yeah, but *I* wouldnt feel that way is about the opposite of empathy. Q: What should I do after taking a cashier on a date? One thing you could do, since you go often to that store, is: start building a basic "relationship" with the cashier. When hes done ringing you up say something that acknowledges how weird what your about to do is and then state that if he never calls you thatll be cook and you can both forget all about it forever. This could go either way! But, you know, its such a personal thing, asking someone out. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. I have been investigating my ability to search for past posts. Should I leave a note in case it's busy at her line? If theyre burning with desire, theyll run into you. My older sister took a bank teller job when I was in my early teens and I recall her complaining of guys hitting on her simply because she was pleasant in manner and appearance. Eventually he came to pick up his little sister on a day I happened to be out sick. - This subreddit is **gender neutral**. I used to wait tables when I was young, and a lot of times guys (and horribly old men, too!) This is bad enough in public, but its a bit worse if youre being put in that situation at work. I dont understand why asking someone out has to be interpreted as some sort of sexual/relationship-driven ritual. (Explaining this because some people look at me funny when I talk about going to the drive-thru). There's this cute girl at a local shop that I visit every day. Like youre causing major pain to someone by giving them your #. WebBe well dressed. Its how our brains are wired up. How to reinitiate conversations online with stranger taking long to answer my mail. Remember that she has to be somewhat friendly with you, don't force her to behave friendly against her will with someone she sees as a creep. I guess you will soon find out if she answers e.g. You won't know where to stop and it'll turn creepy. Additionally, it can be helpful to practice what you want to say beforehand. While I've known this girl she has blocked or otherwise shut out countless guys trying the same thing and that could easily have been me as well. # About I wouldnt have even thought twice about it it honestly never would have occurred to me that it might cause issues for the employee, or that this was a common issue for retail employees to deal with! The next day, as I entered the shop, the whole personnel (all women) grinned at me. Asking is out is just Let me know if youd like to grab coffee sometime. And yes getting asked out does often make me feel uncomfortable if Im not interested. And there was no pressing and he never followed up when I didnt call. Any bashing, hateful attack That is classic. Hello, OP here. Women arent delicate flowers and men, as a gender whole, arent big scary monsters. If the OP says smalltalk isn't a thing, I believe him, and it's another sign that flirting won't go over well. I (female, red-haired) worked in video game retail for a while. If I helped, Im glad! Flirting doesnt bother me as long as the conversation doesnt get gross or rude. About a decade ago, I worked in a store that had mostly male customers. Another good thought in that direction is include them in a party inviteHey, Im having some people over on Saturdaycome on by.. Look the cashier in the eyes when talking and stand up straight as you chat. I worked in a restaurant and customers hit on me often but the man I am now married to, for 38 years (!) I wouldnt necessarily invite someone Id met in this compartmentalized way to my home. Or, to put it more pithily, as this linked post full of citations says in its title, Mythcommunication: Its Not That They Dont Understand, They Just Dont Like The Answer

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